• Old age saying: Walls have ears.
New age saying: Firewalls have ears.
(The WikiLeaks effect)

• Let’s have just 6 months in a year from now on…
That way you’ll live twice as long and be hopeful that your luck will change every 6 months instead of every 12.

• A million websites and nothing to read…

• Indian batsmen are like lemmings.
If one commits suicide in an innings, all the others feel compelled to follow.

© Sunil Rajguru

TV watching kills brain cells.
Sleep deprivation kills brain cells.
Stress kills brain cells.
Junk food kills brain cells.
Smoking, drugs and alcohol kill brain cells.
Certain cosmetics kill brain cells…
…are we already an entirely new human species of brain dead zombies?

• When you clean the cobwebs of the mind, what do you do with all the spiders?

• The time spent on communication in today’s high-tech world is inversely proportional to the quality of the communication itself.

© Sunil Rajguru

• It was once said that if a hundred people repeated a lie a hundred times, it becomes a truth. Well, the Internet would put even Joseph Goebbels to shame. A million people repeat a lie in the form of chain letters, email forwards and other sundry articles a few million times and we have millions of untruths posing around cyberspace as truths. I don’t think anyone knows the definition of truth any more.

• There is an invisible undetectable device that slows down time on weekends and speeds them up on week days.

• America is run by billionaires. They call them industrialists.
India is run by billionaires. We call them politicians.

• Every Indian anchor thinks he’s a polished version of Hard Talk when he’s nothing but another version of Rude Talk.

© Sunil Rajguru

If you have a few words to say… use Twitter.

If you have a few sentences to say… use the Facebook status message.

If you have a few paras to say… blog.

If you have much more to say than that… Shut up. Attention spans are very short in cyberspace…

© Sunil Rajguru

• How does a thing become eco-friendly if you paint it green? Don’t green paint and green ink also degrade the environment? Plus the sky is blue, snow is white, the oceans are blue, the sand is yellow…
The logo for Nature should be a rainbow, not green, which has lost all meaning anyway.

• In India a baby is born every second and a Breaking News item born every two seconds.

• Offline doesn’t mean Deadline.
24/7 online usually means that you are dead from the real world.

• Virtual Unreality: What the computer world actually is…
(Virtual is the opposite of real. Unreal is also the opposite of real… Two double negatives = ?)

• Old dilemma: Does he chuck or not?
New dilemma: Should he be called a chucker or not?

© Sunil Rajguru

• I’ve just completed another revolution around the Sun. Is that cause for celebration? Hum yuhi suraj ke chakkar kat-te rahate hain zindagi bhar aur khush rahate hain. Rotation + Revolution = Illusion that you are progressing meaningfully.

• They say that God makes someone for everyone. In India, there are 944 females for every 1000 males. Does that mean there’s no-one for 56 males out of every 1000? Or is that some kind of Gay indicator?

• When India loses miserably and they show the subsequent Highlights, shouldn’t they be called Lowlights instead?

• There’s a gastronomical gap in my life. My stomach can never keep up with my mouth.

• Don’t worry too much about your roots. You always carry them with you and can plant them wherever you want.

• If you take morning walks in India with a “Sar utha ke jio” attitude, then you’re sure to step on dog poop and other dirt or trip over something.

© Sunil Rajguru

• Six Degrees of Separation just got promoted to Five Degrees of Separation thanks to social networking!

• No matter which religion you follow in this world, there will be more people who do not follow that religion. So relax and make peace with your own God and live your own Life.

• Recently people are scared that Man created Life. But the biggest threat remains that of Man destroying Life.

• The only thing protected by Privacy is Facebook’s Privacy Laws—they are so obscure, dynamic and long that no-one actually knows what they are.

• Every poster remembering a politician has the phrase: “His vision lives on”. Yeah, that’s because no vision ever gets fulfilled in this country and continues to live on indefinitely…

© Sunil Rajguru