BSY: Inquilaab zindabad! Gaddi is my birthright and I shall have it!

Sadanand Gowda: Delhi chalo!

Nitin Gadkari: Tum mujhe numbers do main tumhe BSY se azaadi doonga.

(BSWhy?)

© Sunil Rajguru

∙ The Government is looking to 49% FDI in aviation. If foreign players come, invest and change the names of Indian airline companies…
The Virgin Atlantic Airways probabilities…
Go Airways could become GoVirgin.
Jet Airways could become Virgin Lite.
Kingfisher could become VirginKing.
IndiGo could become IndiVirgin.
If South West Airlines came, then they could revive East West Airlines and call it:
South West East West Airlines.
If China Southern Airlines and China Eastern Airlines also jumped into the fray, then the new entity could be:
China Southern Eastern South West East West Airlines.

∙ BSY: The B in Karnataka BJP stands for BSY!
BJP: The B in BSY stands for BJP!
Bottom line: Soon, it’ll be BSY=BJP Splitter Yedyurappa.

∙ Arrogance of power.
Congress advisor: Here’s the 2009-14 Five-year plan, at the end of which Internet Censorship, bills to suppress federalism, how to dilute RTI, how to stall anti-corruption election reform plans for good etc etc will firmly be in place and we’ll be invincible!
Q: But what if someone else comes to power then?
A: Oops! I never thought of that! Is that even possible?

© Sunil Rajguru

∙ Beta: Papa ye sab kya hai? Saare statues dikhai kyun nahin de rahe hai?
Papa: Beta, ye sab Maya hai!

∙ Old Saying: Empty vessels make a lot of noise.
New Saying: MT vessels make a lot of noise.
(Where MT=Manish Tewari)

∙ BJP ko bahut Darr lag raha hai kyunki Congress bol raha hai… I love you q q q q q q quota…

∙ No virtual understanding
India: Chalo boriya bistar band kar ke chale jao…
Facebook & Google: Par hamara koi boriya bistar hai hi nahin, sab virtual hai!
India: To bas chale jao hamare desh se…
Facebook & Google: Par ham yaha sab hai hi nahin… sab virtual hai…
India: Abbe ye Interent ka off switch kahan hai bhai?

∙ EC official: Aap ka election funding kaise hota hai?
Politician: Sab bhagwaan ke hawale kar diya hai!
EC official: Hawala!

© Sunil Rajguru

BJP to Manmohan: Quit PM’s post. You’ve lost it.
RSS to Advani: Quit PM candidature. You never had it!

Opponents to BSY: Quit politics and stay in jail.
Karuna to Kanimozhi: Quit jail and return to politics!

Bajaj to Mallya: Quit the airline industry. No bailout for you.
Environmentalists to Bajaj: Quit polluting India!

Swamy to Chidambaram: Quit the ministry. You’re tainted.
Politicians to Swamy: Quit troubling all of us all the time!

Congress workers to Rahul: Quit this indecision and lead the country.
Opponents to Rahul: Lead the country? Quit India first!

Team Anna to Government: Quit if you can’t pass Lokpal.
Lokpal to Itself: If anyone will Quit, I know it’ll be me!

Modi to Detractors: Quit troubling me over Godhra.
Detractors to Modi: Quit over Godhra!

RSS to Diggy Raja: Quit maligning us.
Diggy Raja to RSS: Quit your very existence!

Omar to Army: Quit Kashmir.
Army to Omar: Only after the last militant has Quit!

© Sunil Rajguru

Timeline: 2004 to 2011

Voters to BJP: Thanks for everything, but your services are no longer required.

BJP to RSS: Thanks for everything, but your services are no longer required.

RSS to Advani: Thanks for everything, but your services are no longer required.

Advani to Yeddy: Thanks for everything, but your services are no longer required.

Yeddy to Reddys: Thanks for everything, but your services are no longer required.

Reddys to Bellary: Thanks for everything, but your services are no longer required.

Bellary to Itself: Kyunki mining services bache hi nahin hai. Maine kisi ka kya bigaada re, ki main aisa ujad gaya! Sab ke jebe bhar bhar ke main khud kangaal ho gaya hu!

How green was my valley!

The Butterfly Effect: The flapping of a butterfly’s wings in Mexico can unleash a tornado in the US.

The Bellary Butterfly Effect: The flapping of ballot papers in Delhi can unleash an environmental and economic tornado in Bellary.

This version by Sunil Rajguru

I trust my ministers fully (to make mistakes).

The BJP cannot topple us (as we are capable of falling on our own).

There is no dissension in the Cabinet (nobody ever listened to anyone anyway).

We have got a mandate to rule from 2009-14 (So please stop asking about things that happened before 2009 and keep quiet till 2014).

No matter what we will stay the course (even though we are on course for disaster right now).

World economic crisis is deepening (so stop bugging me about national inflation, price rise etc).

The people of Palestine have a right to have their voice heard (but the people of India, please shut up).

The Delhi blast is a grave reminder for us regarding terror (we keep getting such reminders all the time and are totally used to it by now).

Development must be in tune with “felt needs” of the people (“felt” refers to only what the Congress feels).

Nuclear energy is the future (of all agitations across India).

I salute Anna Hazareji (only because PC’s kick totally failed).

The BJP is behaving like a proper Opposition (how improper!)

© Sunil Rajguru

Congress
Then: Can we eradicate corruption?
Now: Can we eradicate Baba and Anna?

BJP
Then: Hey Ram!
Now: Hey Ramdev!

Sibal
Then: Baba is the right choice baby.
Now: Baba is not only right, but far right and RSS.

Lokpal Bill
Then: Will it be able to end corruption?
Now: Will it ever see the light of day?

Diggy Raja
Then: Anna RSS hai.
Now: Baba RSS hai.

The corrupt of India…
Then: LOL!
Now: LOL!

The citizens of India…
Then: Aayega, aayega, aayega Lokpal ek din aayega…
Now: Aayega, aayega, aayega Lokpal ek din aayega…

This version by Sunil Rajguru