∙ Does heaven have Facebook?
Even one in hell will do!

∙ Have I secured my Facebook legacy?

∙ Section of a will…
My bequeath my Facebook Password to my account, which has 2235 Friends, 3456 Status messages, 2356 Likes and memberships to 456 Groups to ….. …..

∙ The last message conundrum…
If I get someone to post “I’m Dead” as my last Status Message and it gets a 100 Likes, then are people appreciating my Status or are they happy that I’m dead?

© Sunil Rajguru

You could be the healthiest person on Earth and still get a killing cancer…

You may never get a major illness in your life and make a single mistake that finishes you off…

You may never do anything wrong and someone else’s mistake might kill you…

Maybe a past life’s bad Karma will finally act and kill you right now…

Maybe there’s a strong malevolent force above us that snuffs out life at random…

Maybe Death is actually a reward…

Whatever it is, stop worrying about Death and Start Living…

© Sunil Rajguru

We live our life and collect memories, thoughts and dreams. When we die, everything perishes save these. In the void, we keep thinking, imagining, dreaming… till eternity.
Methinks… This is the earliest belief I had as a small child and it still sticks with me till this very day.

2. Each of us becomes a star.

I read in the foreword of a book by Arthur C Clarke that scientists had discovered about 100 billion stars. And 100 billion people have walked the Earth so far. That means there’s a star for every person who dies. Maybe that’s what happens to us. When we die, we become a star, mighty and big and full of energy, with the power of sustaining worlds. Grand isn’t it?
Methinks… If this is true, then I’d like to meet the dude who was once our Sun.

3. Don’t take yourself too seriously; you are merely part of a computer program for some higher entity.

This has been thought of in some form or the other in notably the The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and the Matrix series. We are all merely tiny cogs in a giant wheel of which none of us understand or will ever understand. What happens when a part perishes? Nothing. It just ceases to exist and is replaced by another part. You and I are merely “replaceable parts” my friend!
Methinks… This one is good. Enjoy this life while it lasts and don’t think of life after death.

4. Hello! Where are you? We are already dead!

This one was thought up by writers centuries back. We were part of a glorious existence before this life and we all messed up big time! That’s why we are here on Earth, which is actually the Hell of the previous world. We are doomed to be here in some form or other till eternity.
Methinks… This one also makes sense. I first heard it when I was very small.

5. We all become ghosts.

We all become ghosts and wander on this Earth indefinitely. The world is full of the ghosts of all the people, animals and creatures who ever walked this Earth. Since ghosts are made of zero matter and occupy zero matter, they all occupy the same space as we do. They are mere observers or maybe have a world very much like that of Septimus Heap. So right now I (who am writing this blog) and you (who are reading it) are surrounded by thousands of ghosts.
Methinks… Yikes!!!

6. We all join with the Great Soul.

There was a Great Soul of which we were a part. After death we go back and rejoin it. (An old concept in Hinduism) We were all part of a collective consciousness before birth and will become part of it after death. It’s all interconnected. The Web of Life et alia.
Methinks… That guy/gal I can’t stand is actually part of something of which I am a part?

7. We simply get recycled.

What happens to a car when we stop using it? It goes to the scrap yard. Then it gets recycled. Who knows which piece ends up where? Ditto with us. Some part of our body becomes the soil, the air, some animal… Our memories and thoughts get spread out too and become part of the consciousness of Mother Earth.
Methinks… It would be nice to travel simultaneously to many parts of the world in this manner.

8. Nothing.

That’s right. Nothing happens. We just cease to exist. There is no soul. Just as our body perishes, so does our mind, along with its memories, thoughts and desires. Like the last scene of the Terminator in the Terminator movie. Switch off. Blank.
Methinks… I am meeting a childhood friend today after many years who believed in this. Wonder what he thinks now.

9. Re-incarnation.

Re-incarnation Type A: You keep getting re-incarnated as a human being again and again and again maybe till the end of the world.

Re-incarnation Type B: You are a lower life form. Then you get re-incarnated into a higher and higher form, till you finally become a human. You’re one step away from God. (An old concept in Hinduism)

Re-incarnation Type C: Earth is just one in billions and billions of existences. You keep getting re-incarnated in all of them endlessly.

Methinks… It’s getting all too complicated for me.

10. Heaven. Hell. Judgment Day.

This is the oldest of the lot. You live a life on Earth. You do good deeds and bad deeds. Then you are judged on the basis of that and spend an eternity in heaven or hell (or purgatory).
Methinks… This is the least of all I believe in. Think over it. I don’t know about God’s timescale, but this universe will go on for billions of years. Imagine doing something for a few billion years based on something which you’ve done for 60-70 years. Sounds like an exam paper, very unGodlike. Then what about poor souls who died as babies. Then what are the rules of karma etc etc. Sounds like very complicated mathematics.

Then of course, there are many many more things which may happen to us which we can’t even begin to comprehend…

© Sunil Rajguru

“I know that, you don’t have to tell me.”

“You did this because of that.”

“I saw you doing that!”

…and so on.

On being told of the absurdity of it all, he tells us: Where do you think I was before I came here? I was in heaven with God. I could watch all of you whenever I wanted.

An example: Once when we were driving along Old Madras Road, a car trailer passed by. My son told my father-in-law, “Your car also came in such a trailer.” My father-in-law started laughing and parted with the crucial bit of information that the car he was sitting in was bought before he was born. So how did he know? My son folded his hands and gave a knowing glare.

“One day when I was playing in heaven, God called me and told me, “See that Hyundai trailer going down there? That’s carrying your grandfather’s silver-coloured Accent.” Touche!

I decided to end this game. So I caught hold of him once and asked him, “Describe this heaven of yours!”

“Ah it’s a primitive place in the heart of nature full of babies and gods….”

“Gods, I ask, “not God!”

“Well do you think even God can handle thousands of babies together?”

(Point)

“One god is assigned to 15 babies and…”

“Sound a bit like a school full of teachers to me,” I interrupted.

“No, the gods just watch over us, we spend all our time doing… nothing! We have a clear view of Earth and all the people who live there. We can watch every person when and how we want.”

“And what do you do there?”

“We don’t have to do anything at all and at the same time we can do everything we please. Every thing! Now doesn’t that sound like heaven?”

“OK, OK, then how do you come down to Earth?”

“Well we get to choose our parents. We look down and tell our god: Hey I want that woman to be my mother and that man to be my father and that’s how you two got together!”

(Kids always eventually get their way with their parents. But before birth too…???)

“So I don’t decide who I get to marry and the match isn’t even originally selected by god either. You matched us up?”

“Yes,” he replies smugly.

So there’s God’s Will. Then there’s Wife’s Will. And now there’s Son’s Will. I guess for a poor ole man like me, there really is no such thing as Free Will.

***

Another example: “Why are you so naughty and hyperactive, can’t you calm down and relax a bit.”

“I can’t,” he says…

(And I know another Heaven Story is coming)

“When god was throwing Naughtiness Dust on us…”

“What,” I ask, “is that?”

“Well the gods want us to be naughty. It’s a positive trait. We become naughty thanks to Naughtiness Dust which they keep throwing on us. Well, I went and raided the whole stock and that’s why I am the way I am.”

My wife looks shocked and asks, “What did god do when he found out?”

“He still doesn’t know,” sniggers my son.

My wife continues, “But won’t he get angry when he finds out?”

My son slaps his forehead and says wearily, “God is not like a teacher or a parent. He never gets angry at us. His job is only to guide, encourage and help us. He never gets angry. How many times do I have to tell you that?”

***

My son has a habit of shooting rapid fire questions in the night when me and my wife are about to fall asleep.

“What happens when you put a ton of ice in a pool of lava?”

“What if there’s a Black Hole outside our window right now? Can I check?”

“What if tomorrow doesn’t come when we get up tomorrow?”

“What if our whole life is actually a dream? What happens when we get up?”

“Can we go to Disneyland for our next vacation?”

“Can you buy me another Transformers action figure on your way back from work? I won’t ask for another toy for 10 years!”

They keep coming like an incessant waterfall.

Once he broached the topic of death.

“What happens after death? Where do we go? Why do some people go early? Why don’t you check the Internet for that? You check the Internet for everything anyway…”

I got really bugged and asked him, “OK, you’re the wise guy. You came from heaven. You once asked that god be requisitioned to start an email service between heaven and earth. You knew god. You tell me how we go back there after death.”

“But why would you want to go to heaven,” asks my son calmly.

“Don’t we all go to heaven when we die?” I ask exasperated.

“No!” he says firmly.

“Why?” I ask “sleepily.”

“You come from heaven to earth. So why would you want to go back to a place from where you came?”

(My reserve patience runs out at this stage)

OK, you tell me quick: What happens after death?

My son thinks for a second and says, “The soul splits into many pieces and every piece goes to a different world, a different universe and a different existence.”

That’s too deep for me. I can’t take it any more. I have to go to sleep.

Good Night!

© Sunil Rajguru