∙ I registered a million cumulative Likes on Facebook in my life and yet everybody hated me!

∙ Does heaven have Facebook?
Even one in hell will do!

∙ Have I secured my Facebook legacy?

∙ Section of a will…
My bequeath my Facebook Password to my account, which has 2235 Friends, 3456 Status messages, 2356 Likes and memberships to 456 Groups to ….. …..

∙ The last message conundrum…
If I get someone to post “I’m Dead” as my last Status Message and it gets a 100 Likes, then are people appreciating my Status or are they happy that I’m dead?

© Sunil Rajguru

Step 1. A competitor comes out with a change.
Step 2. Facebook changes overnight.
Step 3. We resist, scramble, grumble, complain…
Step 4. We totally get used to it. Many new users join in.
Step 5. Immediately go back to Step 1.

∙ Facebook  has mastered the art of penniless acquisitions.
Instead of taking over Twitter, it cannibalized the Twitter Status Update.
Instead of fighting Google+, it simply became Facebook+.

∙ The Facebook Evolution…
From: What’s on your mind?
To: I know what’s on your mind!

∙ Another Facebook related change…
From now on, WTF! will stand for What The Facebook!

∙ Wanted, a self-help book…
Help! Who moved my Facebook?
Potential customers: 750 million and counting.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Obama has just caught and killed Osama
–>1,234,341 people Like this Status
Zardari–>Really? When? Don’t tell me!
ISI–>We also helped, but you’ll never know.
Taliban–>We know and we’ll show you, just you wait!
Chidambaram–>Ab hamari baari hai.
Zardari–>Don’t try to spoil the moment. Shoo!

General Kayani has just changed his status from “Lay off US” to “Lay off India”
Manmohan–>But what about our talks?
Sonia–>I think its time you concentrated on the domestic scene for a change
Manmohan–>Yes, Soniaji!
General Kayani–>Guys, please lay off my Wall!

Al-Zawahari has just deleted the Ultra Secret Closed Group “Osama Speaks”

Al-Zawahari has just been promoted to head of Al-Qaeda

Obama played the Mystic Tarot Game
And the Answer is: Your Rajyoga will continue till 2017
–>234 Republicans dislike this status

Abbottabad Osama Memorial Haveli Page created
–>1,234,342 have become fans

ISI has just put the Abbottabad Osama Memorial Haveli on sale
–>Last bidder bid $456 million…

A Pakistan Citizen is feeling sad that Osama is no more
–>1,234,342 people Like this Status

ISI–>CIA
Can you please please call us? Too many misunderstandings to sort out.
Show 134 Similar Posts

Zardari clicked the “Remove Friend” button on Obama’s profile by mistake, since then, they have become Friends again

Barack Obama sent George W Bush an invitation using Catch the Terrorist virtual game:
I challenge you to a game of Catch the Terrorist. I just scored 23,400 points in the game.
Think you can beat me?
P.S. I caught Osama and you didn’t!

Dawood has just deleted his Facebook account

ISI tried to join the Group CIA, but was denied access

David Cameron became a fan of Obama

Al-Qaeda has petitioned Facebook to make an “Add Enemies” application

Obama requests all his detractors to lay off, now that he has beaten the daylights out of all Republicans in catching terrorists.
P.S. I have a Nobel Peace Prize too!

This version By Sunil Rajguru

• Real World
A & B are chatting…
C comes along and A says to C (pointing to B): We’re friends.
Virtual World
Facebooker A and Facebooker B are chatting.
A: Who are you?
B: We’re friends!

• “Real”ly…
Just because I don’t say it, it doesn’t mean that I don’t love you.
Virtually…
Just because I don’t comment, it doesn’t mean that I haven’t read your Status Message (Or seen your picture/album etc)

• A common dilemma…
To update or not to update, that’s the question.

• “A birthday a day” means you’re looking at your Facebook Events section.

© Sunil Rajguru

• By the time we die, I’m sure we’ll be able to sum up our life story in 140 characters.

• A definition of Globalization:
If there was no corruption in India, then the Swiss Banking System would collapse.

• A thought for today:
Never judge a Friend by his Status Messages.

• Remember: In India, a politician’s RTC beats our RTI.
(RTC=Right to Corruption)

• Right now there are many scams going around in your neighbourhood, city, state and country. Since most of them are undetected and invisible, you sleep well.

© Sunil Rajguru

• You are only as good as your last status message.

• I feel so naked… like everything in my life has been put up on Facebook.

• My life is in a state of flux… just like the Facebook interface.

• Yesterday: I have hundreds of friends!
Fibber!
Today: I have hundreds of friends!
FBer!

• Hasn’t the world suddenly become a “Friend”lier place?

© Sunil Rajguru

Facebook’s new logo should be…

Tinker, Tailor, Solder, Spy

(They keep tinkering with the privacy settings, tailoring the interface non-stop

and soldering our profile pages. And of course we know that all our personal

information and content is open to spying).

This Version By Sunil Rajguru